Coming Out: Latest Edition

Last Saturday morning, I was bored and had nothing to do. I remembered a friend way back in 2nd year college who I just saw again last week. We had a great conversation when we met. I actually felt infatuated with him that night, although during our college days he was really just a friend. Anyway, I asked him how he is, and here’s our conversation:

Him: eto, cute pa rin. :-) kaw?

Me: hahaha… eto payatot pa rin at cute pa rin (gaya-gaya, hehe)

Him: ano balita? ano bago?

Me: Ganun pa rin. work, ganun pa rin. lovelife, ganun pa rin. single. (I actually opened up the lovelife part in the hope of him saying that he’s also single…)

Him: choice mo ba’ng maging single?

Me: hindi… actually, it’s complicated.

Him: hehehe, friendster.

Me: hahaha… basta… can u keep a secret?

Him: sure, ako pa.

Me: I’m gay.

I was worried of what his answer would be. And then:

Him: so? it does not make you less of a person. kelan pa?

I was relieved of his open-minded answer. So I told him the same old story of coming to terms with my sexuality. I was actually frustrated that he said he's straight, but nonetheless, I’m glad that he was okay with what I told him. Thank God for people like him. I actually took a very big risk by coming out to him, but whatever happens, I don’t really mind. At least I can be myself when I’m dealing with him.

P.S. Now you know where boredom could lead to.

Here I Go Again...

This morning, on board a jeep on my way to work, I noticed this cute moreno guy sitting at the end nearest the door. He was wearing a shirt, gray shorts, white socks, and white rubber shoes. I was on the opposite side, with three others beside me. I glanced at the guy, and he also looked at me. Our eyes met, but we immediately turned our eyes away from each other's eyes. (puro eyes ah) When the three people beside me alighted the jeep, I moved to the end right across the guy. He looked at me, I looked at him, our eyes met again, we looked away again; all this happened twice I think. I did not actually know what he was thinking so I waited for him to make a move. Unfortunately, he didn't make any. I looked at him more, but when he finally called on the driver to stop as he was about to leave, I looked away. On his way out, I saw from my peripheral view that he looked towards my direction. But since I was not looking, I never had the chance to see if he made any signal or what. He alighted near the PLDT office along East Avenue, and walked towards Jollibee without looking back, even as I was looking at him the whole time.

Could he be gay? Or was it just nothing at all? Anyway, if he is gay, I hope he reads this and realizes that he is the guy here and that I really like him. And that I hope to see him again, and that next time, I hope he makes a move. Haha.

Anti-Discrimination in the Philippines

As I was reading through my blog subscriptions this morning, I came across AJ's entry on what we should know about the Anti-Discrimination Bill (HB 956), which he got from Jonas Bagas. After reading the entry, I checked the House of Representatives website to check the status of the bill. Here is what I found:

HB00956

Session No.: 14-1RS-006

Significance: N

Date Filed: 2007-07-10

Full Title: AN ACT PROHIBITING DISCRIMINATION ON THE BASIS OF SEXUAL ORIENTATION AND GENDER IDENTITY AND PROVIDING PENALTIES THEREFOR

Short Title: "Anti-Discrimination Act"

Principal Author: HONTIVEROS-BARAQUEL, ANA THERESIA "RISA"

Date Read: 2007-08-01

Primary Referral: HUMAN RIGHTS

Bill Status: Pending with the Committee on HUMAN RIGHTS since 2007-08-01

*Source: House of Representatives. House Bills and Resolutions Online Query

It's sad to know that the bill as filed during the 14th Congress is still pending at the committee level 10 months after it's referral. But what's more saddening is the fact that LGBT groups have been pushing for this since 1999, according to Mr. Jonas Bagas. I am hoping that this bill becomes a law soon, but to do that, there is a great need to educate and enlighten those who are against it, and to gain the support of those who are inclined not to act for or against the approval of the bill. While this blog may only be visited by a few, I am still hoping that I could help in little ways for this cause.

Allow me to repost an excerpt of Mr. Bagas' entry:

Ten things you need to know about the Anti-Discrimination Bill:

Fight for equal rights for lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transgenders (LGBTs) by pushing for the passage of the Anti-Discrimination Bill (HB 956) authored by AKBAYAN Rep. Risa Hontiveros-Baraquel.

Here’s what the bill is all about:

Equal rights, not special rights. The bill does not grant additional or special rights to LGBTs. What it does is criminalize violations to the human rights and freedoms on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. The bill affirms and promotes human rights and freedoms that are enshrined in the Constitution.

Equality in schools. The bill prohibits discrimination against LGBT students, which usually takes place through unfair admission policies, unjust expulsion, and unreasonable disciplinary actions.

Equal opportunities in employment. By criminalizing unfair labor practices and policies on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity, the bill promotes decent jobs for LGBT workers.

Removing stigma in healthcare. The bill bans hospitals, clinics, and medical personnel like doctors and nurses from discriminating against or abusing LGBT patients.

Fighting police abuse. Stiffer penalties are imposed on law enforcers who abuse the law – from bagansya to the anti-trafficking law - to harass, torture, or extort money from LGBTs.

Organizing for LGBT pride. The bill affirms the freedom of assembly and association by disallowing discrimination in the establishment of LGBT groups in schools, workplace, communities and in politics.

Equal access to establishments. The bill ensures that establishments that are open to the public like malls, restaurants, and bars, among others, are open to all, regardless of sexual orientation and gender identity.

Gays and lesbians in the police and military. The police and military are barred from screening out competent LGBTs who want to join the force. Under the bill, they are also not allowed to remove LGBT policeman or woman and soldiers due to their sexual orientation and gender identity.

Penalizing discrimination. Under the bill, a person found guilty of discriminating against LGBTs can be fined up to P500,000 and/or imprisoned for a maximum of six years. S/he may also be required to undergo human rights education.

About non-discrimination, not same-sex marriage. Homophobic groups wrongfully claim that the bill is about same-sex marriage. Here’s the truth: 1.) the legal recognition of same-sex marriage requires a separate bill, and; 2.) there is absolutely nothing wrong about consensual same-sex relationships.

Is it too much to ask not to be treated as second-class citizens? Please, WE DO NEED THIS BILL SIGNED INTO LAW!

Oh My Friend, Are U One of Us?

I went out with my college friends a few weeks back. One of them was the guy who I would consider my first love, although it was a one-way thing because I never told him how I really felt for him despite the fact that I already came out to them (my barkada) a few years back. As usual, we all tried to catch up on what's happening with our lives, in terms of career, family, karir (as in love life). Haha. My friends teased him that he's gay, 'coz he never talked about who he is dating, although it seemed pretty obvious that he was indeed seeing someone. And while all this was happening, I was so hopeful that he would finally come out to us. Although I never really thought that he could be gay, I have always wished that he is. I was so into him during our college years. I remember even giving up some time to study on weekends just so I could be with him. We were actually very close until I came out to them. He became aloof. And so I did not have the chance to even tell him how I feel. I don't know if the reason why he distanced himself from me was that he felt that I had a thing for him and didn't want me to pursue it, or that he is indeed one of us and was afraid that I would find out. Anyway, up to now I still am clueless as to whether he's straight or not. But I do hope that if ever he is one of us, he would tell me eventually, not so much because I hope to get romantically involved with him, but because I need to have someone close to my heart with whom I can really be myself.

Please Release Me...

The other night, I dreamed of meeting one hot guy who told me straight in the face, "Sige na, mukhang gustong gusto mo na akong halikan eh." ("Go ahead, it seems you badly want to kiss me.") And so we engaged in one long torrid kiss. It seemed so real. Unfortunately, nothing else happened.

Last night, I slept with hopes of this dream having a continuation. When I woke up this morning, I was frustrated that I had no idea what my dream was all about. On my way to work, I sat beside this tall and cute guy and I was lucky enough that the jeep was full, so I had an excuse to rub my thigh against his. (I'm so bad...) I felt the tension inside me. But then, I had to go to work and had to be contented with that. At least my mind could be diverted from thoughts of hot guys and stuff while I'm at work.

As I was checking my blog subscriptions, I had to see this post from Migs, the Manila Gay Guy! Oh brother! Dennis Trillo is dancing topless, with Careless Whisper as BGM. It seems I hear another song singing, "Please release me, let me go..." from inside me... Waaah! It would be one hell of a day. Hay...

Lea...

Lea Salonga celebrates her musical career on May 23 and 24 at the PICC Plenary Hall with Lea, My Life... On Stage. Join her as she relives the highlights of her career from childhood to West End to Broadway and to what she is as a performer today. Buy your tickets now at Ticketworld outlets or at the Ticketworld website.

What the?!

Last weekend, I was chatting with someone and while we were at the customary NASL? Stats?, he asked me, "So are you bi?" I answered, "I'm gay." To which he replied, "Oh, so you are a gay!" I wanted to correct him with his use of "a" but I decided not to. I thought perhaps it was just a simple mistake on his part. But he kept repeating it. I eventually said goodbye.

But something worse was yet to come. While chatting with another guy, he asked me, "So are you a male, gay, or bi?" We both knew at this point that we are both males, since we already exchanged information about our age, sex, and location. What's wrong with him? I told him, "Hey, we are both males, so please clarify your question." He answered, "Are you a male, gay, or bi?" And I figured what he meant to ask was whether I am straight, gay, or bisexual. So I told him I'm gay, without trying to conceal the fact that I was really pissed off. Gosh, they're giving me a headache.

That's what you get from a boring weekend.